


Strained

by tealcoloredtrash



Category: Persona 2
Genre: Angst, Heavily Based on The Ending of Innocent Sin, Heavy Angst, Hurt No Comfort, I Have A Lot of Feelings About Philemon and Tatsuya, Implied/Referenced Character Death, M/M, Other, Tatsujun Is Not The Center of The Fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-18
Updated: 2020-02-18
Packaged: 2021-02-27 23:35:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,797
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22784191
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tealcoloredtrash/pseuds/tealcoloredtrash
Summary: It didn't feel like it was long ago that Philemon was smiling at Tatsuya and praising the boy and his friends as they defied Nyarlathotep, giving them a soft smile and getting a look of adoration from Tatsuya, even if he denied it.It wasn't long ago, either, that he was lucky enough to be indulged as though he were Tatsuya's own father figure, being confided in as he questioned himself and vented about his social life.Perhaps this is his own sin, one that was deservent of his own type of punishment.
Relationships: Kurosu Jun/Suou Tatsuya
Comments: 1
Kudos: 56





	Strained

When Tatsuya lurched forward he had never felt his legs go so fast, and yet his sword sliced through nothing but the air as he watched Nyarlathotep fade from existence right before his eyes. He stared at the spot with tense shoulder and a grip on his blade that turned his knuckles pale as the rage and grief over came his body.

Not too far from him he heard the choked sobs of Lisa, the panicked breathing of Jun, and the wavery mumbling of Michel as they all tried to process the event that just took place.

Philemon stared silently at the scene, his body and voice infuriatingly still and calm for Tatsuya's liking. Even with his back turned, he knew Philemon wasn't feeling the same as all of them. He couldn't experience their grief. This whole thing... It was just some bet to him, some game.

"There is a way to change this reality."

Everyone immediately looked to Philemon, all save for Tatsuya who merely allowed the rage to simmer within him while side eyeing the being before them to show that he was listening, even if he really didn't want to.

"However.... You all must forget. Forget about that fateful summer day. That was when Nyarlathotep began to weave the threads of fate. If you all forget..."

Tatsuya felt eyes on him for a moment before seeing Philemon's head turn just enough to look down at Maya.

"This tragedy would never have occurred. A new time woven, and a world reborn..."

"You can... Do that?"

Michel was the only one with the strength to speak, their voice wavering as they tried not to cry at the event they had to witness. Their eyes were sad, if hopeful about the situation Philemon was choosing to describe.

Philemon simply continued to stare at the ground as he spoke.

"The human heart has the power to change the flow of reality. Even without Xibalba or the Crystal Skull, all of your strong wills and actions have the power to change reality. The power that created your cosmos is one and the same with the power you all hold."

Philemon paused to look between the children before him.

"In this collective unconsciousness.... It is possible."

They all stared back, wide eyed with hearts feeling somewhat lighter just from the possibility of being able to have another chance, another opportunity to live a normal life, one last shot to bring Maya back and fix everything.

Though, they all guessed the power of the collective unconsciousness could only go so far.

"Do you mean... To start over from the beginning..." Jun began, dabbing his tears away and forming black blots on the sleeve of his jacket as he kept his eyes away from the mess that crept closer and closer to his loafers.

"In return for our memories...?" He finished, bringing the connotations of Philemon's words to light, receiving a sharp gasp from Lisa while Michel looked down to the floor in pain.

"You mean... We'll just forget everyone?" Lisa stood fast, her hands balled into fists as she gave a soft sniffle, seemingly uncaring for the black tears that ran down her face.

"I don't want to! I cant! There has to be another way Philemon!" Her voice was loud and sharp, no discernable echo being heard and adding to the abrupt noise that made everyone wince just a little.

"Not in this world. Not while he has power here, at least. The dark hearts of the people wishing for destruction are unconsciously aiding him, feeding his power." Philemon sighed his eyes now worriedly drifting to Tatsuya, who had been breathing sharply while balling his fists up and releasing them, his sword hand stilling while his grip remained as tight as it was when he flung at Nyarlathotep. He didn't budge at all when Philemon spoke, his back towards everyone and his jaw clenched shut.

The worst part? Nobody could blame him.

"In order to suppress him," Philemon continued. "People must change. You four... You will create a new world."

There was a moment of silence amongst them all.

"I... I wont forget." Jun choked out, looking fondly to Tatsuya with a distraught glance. "How could I forget...."

"Hell yeah.. I ain't gonna forget!" Michel's voice added to the fraught exclamations, their voice losing its characteristically energetic twang and being replaced with a determined, if ultimately, somber undertone.

"If every thing was set up by him thought... Let's do it. Let's teach that bastard that things won't go his way anymore."

Michel gave a forced smile, giving up on their attempt to prevent tears from streaming down their face, their lips twitching as they tried to stay positive. 

Maya would have appreciated it, at least.

Lisa tried to match Michel's new attitude, despite the fact she was still sobbing.

"Yeah... We WILL meet again.... Right?"

Her voice was small, though still louder and stronger than Tatsuya's lack thereof. All he could allow himself to do was stare at the so-called ground beneath him and aggressively flick his lighter open and close, sending worried looks amongst his friends.

Were it not for the situation, they would try to cheer him up. Sadly, it seemed fate was against them.

"Now then, see yourself as who you should be. May your powers mold a new reality."

Tatsuya begrudgingly and stiffly turned around with an empty and dolorous expression, taking heavy footsteps towards everyone one last time. His eyes were trained on the ground, even as Michel tried to crack one last joke before they would all forget eachother.

Lisa laughed as though this compromise was merely temporary, while Jun stared and tried to console Tatsuya silently, sighing as Tatsuya payed him little attention.

This would be the last time they saw eachother, the last time they could remember eachother as friends who have almost died for one another while trying to forget the permanence of their sacrifice.

Lisa was the first to leave, her melancholic smile fading the last moment as her body faded with her. Even if her feigned obsession with Tatsuya got them into some dirt at the rumormills, she was the only one he trusted at Seven's, the only one he felt safe around without needing to shove an entire stick up his ass.

Michel turned to Tatsuya and gave a peace sign, their resigned smile being the last thing he saw as their body disappeared. He didn't even like Michel at first, but after being with them for months it was hard to hate them. They just wanted him to feel better about everything, they just wanted to be everyone's pick me up.

Tatsuya didn't even get to process Maya's body being gently taken from the ground beneath him, leaving no indication of the awful crime committed moments ago. He should have been faster. Maybe it could have been him even, just to give the others more time to deal with Nyarlathotep. In the end, he couldn't leave his own mother figure, the person who always tried to support Tatsuya and make sure he was stable with everything happening to him at such a young age, even if she was bad at helping carry some of the burdens that came with being the unspoken leader.

Jun took slow steps to approach Tatsuya, taking a shaky breath while gently stretching his hand forward to grab Tatsuya's empty one with a delicate grasp, staying still even as Tatsuya dropped his katana to the floor.

Jun closed the space between them, using his other hand to gently wrap around Tatsuya's waist as he leaned in for a kiss, his smile widening as he felt Tatsuya melt underneath him, even if it was a little. When he pulled away, he reached up to gently wipe away a stray tear on his lover's cheek.

"A kiss. So i could never forget my Tacchi...."

And just like that, he sniffed softly as he felt Jun's fingertips pull away, his smile soon becoming non-existent as he felt his hand holding onto nothing, his body feeling cold as he watched the one thing he loved most become nothing but lights in the collective unconsciousness and leaving nothing but emptiness in its wake. Tatsuya did nothing but hold his own hand while silently crying while none of his friends were able to see such weakness.

Then Philemon stepped forward.

"Well then.... We will part for a short time"

Tatsuya felt his breathing pick up as he balled his fists again at hearing his voice, his sobs becoming more apparent as his emotions began to hit a fever pitch. He fixated on the greyish-black teardrops that pooled on the floor as Philemon continued talking.

"Are there any final words you would like to say?"

Tatsuya turned to face Philemon, the being looking in some state of empathy for the kid in front of him, whose body now shook with resentment and despair while his breathing grew ragged from the sobs that broke free.

As Philemon tried to reach a hand out, he was met with Tatsuya's fist angrily meeting the center of his mask, cracking it as it flew off the God's face. Instead of showing anger or simply avoiding it, he allowed Tatsuya the comfort before picking up the mask and meeting Tatsuya's surprised, rage filled glare.

"I am the one who exists in the boundaries between consciousness and unconsciousness. I am thou, and thou art I. I will always be watching from within you."

Philemon was slow to put the mask back on, watching as Tatsuya turned and refused to look back at him.

"I pray that you are able to break this unwritten law and remember your loved ones again, Tatsuya."

No response.

Growing somewhat despondent, Philemon sighed and raised his hand, preparing to send Tatsuya off.

"Farewell then."

And just like that, Tatsuya was whisked off to reshape his world, Philemon staring at the floor beneath with an equally empty gaze as he surrounded himself in silence. It didn't feel like it was long ago that he was smiling at Tatsuya and praising the boy and his friends as they defied Nyarlathotep, not long ago that he was lucky enough to be indulged as though he were Tatsuya's own father figure. And now? Here he stood, a newly cracked mask on his face and some feelings that he would never had hoped to feel or understand as a being of this realm.

Perhaps this, this is what Tatsuya felt. Perhaps this is his own sin, one that was deservent of his own type of punishment. 

At the end if the day, Philemon wouldn't be surprised if Tatsuya no longer feeling any sort of love or sentiment towards him was its own ugly form of punishment.


End file.
